New Year. Same You. Same Me.
A fresh start is one of the things I liked about working on an academic calendar. Each school year had a new beginning and a definite end with new students, new programs, new ideas, and more! New calendar years also provide an opportunity to reboot - a chance to rethink, revise, and re-energize. But, often we get caught up in the hope that we can change ourselves from the outside in.
A few years ago, a friend of mine lost a lot of weight and thought her life would change for the better. Some things did change for her like feeling better, living a healthier life, and better fitting clothes. These were wonderful and welcome changes that did make a difference for her but she was expecting more. She quickly learned that she was the same person on the inside with the same problems at work and at home. With or without the weight, her true self didn’t change.
No matter what external changes you plan to make this year, remember the old adage, “it’s what’s on the inside that counts.” And, what is on the inside of you is beautiful! King David wrote a song to God with the following lyrics,
“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made…You saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be” (Psalm 139:13-16).
These words insist that you and I were meant to be born and that we each have a purpose. We have been created to be unique and special. These words make it hard to fathom the accidental-ness of life. We matter. Whatever your beliefs, please know that you are beautifully made, you are meant to be here, and you have a purpose.
I love Brene Brown’s simple but profound words, “You are enough.” She goes on to say, “Believing that you're enough is what gives you the courage to be authentic.” Maybe 2024 is the year of discovering or re-discovering your goodness and authenticity. Maybe this new year is about slowing down, breathing, and living in each moment — fully being, fully loving, and fully enough.
If you have or haven’t set your new year’s resolutions yet, consider setting a goal from the below list of things that might help you on your journey to finding the beautiful you that is enough.
Meditate and take deep breaths. Get comfortable, set your timer and try to clear your mind. Take deep breaths and attempt to concentrate on one thing or no thing. Start with 3 minutes and build up time. This daily activity can bring calm and clarity to you throughout your day.
Be kind to yourself. Treat yourself like you would treat a dear friend or family member. Christopher Germer says, “A moment of self-compassion can change your entire day. A string of such moments can change the course of your life.”
Play and rest. Schedule time for relaxing activities and rest. If your body is telling you it is tired, then give it rest or sleep. Find ways to destress and refresh through play like being outside, laughing, dancing, moving, or enjoying people. Look for opportunities that will bring balance between work, play, and rest.
Try new things. A friend of mine set her new year’s resolution to try every new fruit she came across. It was a fun and adventurous goal!
Say no or say yes. Say no to things that exhaust you, trap you, or get you in a funk. Say yes to things that bring calm, peace, meaning, and connection.
Choose less “screen time” to make room for other things. Reading, writing, art, or music can be creative outlets that can remind us that we are unique and special.
Commit to small but meaningful changes in your daily routine. Spend daily time outdoors (even if only for a few minutes), wake up a little earlier so as to ease morning stress, or eat dinner at the table instead of in front of a screen.
Perhaps this article resonated with where you are in life. If you are feeling lost or stuck, overwhelmed or without purpose, then consider coaching. It could be the tool that helps you along in your process of self discovery.
Cheers to a new year, new beginnings, and being enough! May this new year bring you joy, peace, and hope.
References:
Brown, B. (2010). The gifts of imperfection: Let go of who you think you are supposed to be and embrace who you are. Hazelden.
Germer, C. K. (2014). The mindful path to self-compassion: Freeing yourself from destructive thoughts and emotions. Nota.